We all deal with rejection at some point in our lives. Most of us are big enough to absorb the loss and the emotional pain, and we move on. We continue to care about others and care for them. We continue to be open to relationships of all kinds. We continue to nurture, build and create relationships with friends, lovers and family.
Many of us know someone who cannot function this way. We know someone who we see regularly but who never really seems to care about anyone. We are all just characters in a scene to that person. We play our parts, co-worker, acquaintance, neighbor, but we cannot really build a relationship with him or her. He never lets us in. She never makes time to get to know us. They aren’t interested in our lives and we know that.
We think they are cold, distant, maybe even selfish. They know they are all alone in their world. But they don’t know why.
The persona is comprised of different faculties, or bodies of influence. The intellect has its realm, the physical body and spiritual body or soul also have their domains, so too the emotional body has its being, function and purpose.
Like the physical body, when the emotional body is battered, it recoils, may become wounded, injured, and need time for recovery. If repeatedly or seriously injured, the emotional body may become incapacitated. I liken that to a coma. In such a severe case, the intellect is left alone to deal with life issues it is entirely unequipped to understand. The injured personality knows she cannot relate, but she does not remember a time when she could relate to people. The emotional pain is hidden behind a door that cannot be opened. She is lost, confused, and numb. He will not open that door again because his weakness lies behind it.
Such is the damage with extreme rejection. The personality has no capacity to withstand further rejection, and it recoils, refuses to engage again, until it can heal. This process can take months, years, or a lifetime.
There are many forms of rejection. Mothers and fathers reject their children. Lovers reject their mates. Siblings and family turn their backs on one another. Friends break up. All sorts of relationships end. We carry the bruises with us and take a chance every time we open our hearts and lives to a new friend. Consider the losses some people have endured and compare them to your own.
A broken heart needs time to mend.
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